VoiceDialogue.com

Connecting Energetically with Others
 

Have you ever felt as though your partner is not really listening to you even though they can repeat the words you have said? Do you get a cold feeling with some people and a warm feeling with others? Have you ever felt really intimate with someone and feel that you know exactly what they are feeling or what they are going to say?

We are all aware that we communicate using verbal language and body language but there is another aspect to communication that our Western culture does not acknowledge. This is energetic communication.

We all connect with other people on an energetic level, even though some of us feel this connection while others are not aware of it. We all have an energy field around us that stems from within us. There is a lot of information about this energy field available from mainly alternative sources and in indigenous cultures but not that much from traditional sources in western culture.

In many circles you would be laughed at if you spoke about energetic connection between people but at the same time we all use words and expressions which acknowledge it. For instance, most of us are familiar with the expression of 'being left cold' by someone; or describing someone as 'warm and open'; or thinking about our partner as not really 'with us' even though they are physically there; or felt sex as being 'empty' with 'no connection'.

We also talk about the 'vibe' of a person or place, or a party really 'buzzing', or a dinner party being 'low key'. 

So even though the energy between people is something we appear to have an instinctual understanding of, and people who deny its existence still use language to describe it, it is probably because in our left brain- and empirical science-dominated world we have no scientifically accepted way to measure energetic connection, that we scoff at it as a concept.

Until we develop scientific ways of measuring energetic reality and its effects, at least we can gain awareness of it through direct experience, for it is possible to fine-tune your awareness and sensitivity to the energetic shifts that occur in yourself and in your relationships with others.

Each facet of the human psyche has an energetic reality. Each inner self within our psyche is an energetic entity with physical expression in the body. 

The energetic feeling of your rational mind is very different to the feeling of your pleasing self, your perfectionistic self or your sexual self. And how these individual aspects of your personality connect energetically with other people also differs.

The quality of our relationships with other people is largely determined by how the selves our personalities are made up of interact energetically. If the main part of your personality is energetically open and warm you will prefer to mesh energy fields with others. If you are cooler and more impersonal and businesslike you will prefer a more impersonal connection with others. In both cases, you will also be both attracted to the opposite energy, and repelled, at different times. 

Now add to the formula the energetic nature of the other selves you are expressing (examples could be the action-oriented pusher who disregards relationship; the energetically invasive controlling parent who has to know everything about her children or partner; the energetically inviting sensual self who has a very specific and universally recognisable quality), and you can see how complex our energetic interactions with others can be. It really is a 'dance of the selves' in our relationships.

If you want to understand your relationships better and have some choice in how your energetic interactions take place, then learning about this aspect of relating is incredibly valuable. Voice Dialogue will offer you much in this area as will other energy work that teaches you to become more conscious of your energy field.

For help with strengthening your energetic connection with your partner, please see my book The Perfect Relationship.

For further reading on the aware ego process, please visit my Amazon Bookstore.